Serial monogamy is often viewed as a good quality because you’re seen as commitment minded, yet there are downsides to always being tied to someone else. Jumping from one relationship to the next doesn’t leave time for introspection, discovering your needs versus your wants, or simply adjusting your dating strategies. Relying solely on your emotions to drive your choices in love means you’re at the whim of your fickle feelings.

The part of you that desires connection, intimacy, comfort, and safety of a partnership wins out over your desire to find someone who’s a good match for the long term.

Serial monogamists are rarely solo for any length of time because underneath their desire for connection is fear, they dread being alone. They don’t want to spend time in self-reflection because they avoid looking at their past mistakes. They fear dating because it feels vulnerable, unpredictable, and makes them anxious. Rather than looking for an ideal match, they’re avoiding loneliness and discomfort.

Serial monogamy often becomes a pattern that keeps you from healing, growing, or creating genuine, long-lasting love. It prevents you from doing the inner work required to break the cycle and show up for a new kind of relationship—the kind where you’re fully seen, accepted, and loved for who you truly are.

How do you know if serial monogamy is blocking you from love and what can you do to break the cycle?

7 Ways Serial Monogamy Keeps You From The Real Thing

1. Choosing What’s Comfortable Instead Of What’s Right

If you’re always in a relationship, how do you know the difference between choosing what feels safe and familiar, rather than what supports your long-term happiness? When you’re driven by a fear of being alone it’s easy to settle for someone who fits into your life without challenging you to grow. These relationships are convenient and somewhat shallow, leaving you unfulfilled.

Comfort is overrated on your journey to finding a beloved partner. There’s nothing risky about choosing what feels safe and familiar. Gravitating toward partners who are easy to get along with and never challenge you will never create the intimacy your heart desires. These convenient relationships never have the potential for love to deepen over time, they fall flat and are not sustainable.

Long-lasting love doesn’t result from just feeling safe and comfortable together. Two people grow together rather than apart because they evolve together. A soul-satisfying love relationship stands the test of time because of a stronger bond that is developed through the challenges they face.

What To Do Instead:

Pause and have some solo time before your next relationship. Reflect on why the previous relationship didn’t succeed, and evaluate what you could do differently the next time around to avoid repeating the same patterns.

Discover the difference between your needs and your wants. Create a chart of your relationship history and examine the commonalities to find your patterns in love.

2. Mistaking Ease For Compatibility

The saying, “Everything you want is outside your comfort zone,” is accurate with love. If you haven’t mastered uncomfortable conversations, not asking the hard questions, or not communicating your needs, you’re not navigating real life together. Instead, you’re swept up in the relief of having someone, anyone, to soften the ache of being alone.

Serial monogamy can feel like a soft place to land when you’re tired of the ups and downs of dating, unfortunately ease doesn’t equal compatibility. Being with someone in partnership because you don’t want to be on your own means you’ll brush off evaluating if they’re a fit for the long haul and settle for short-term comfort.

Going exclusive for convenience rather than a deep connection or shared values, a part of you knows there’s nothing more than a superficial connection. Going along to get along may be a great strategy for avoiding conflict, but it’s a terrible one for finding long-lasting, soul-satisfying love with an ideal partner.

The most important decision you’ll ever make is who to share your life with. Compatibility develops when your values align, and you’re able to work through conflict together. Compatibility means you can live together in harmony, and your two lives are coherent.

What To Do Instead:

Ask yourself, “Do I feel seen and accepted in this relationship, or simply relieved I’m not on my own?” Emotional intimacy requires you to risk discomfort for the sake of creating a stronger bond. The ideal partnership provides an environment for growth, and each of you evolves toward your highest and best selves.

3. Skipping The Healing Phase

When you move from one relationship to another without taking time to reflect, grieve, or consider what went wrong and what you could’ve done differently, you carry your unhealed wounds into the next relationship. You’re never starting a relationship from a fresh or more evolved perspective, and ultimately bringing baggage into the next romantic engagement.

Serial monogamy gives you a false sense of progress. You think the next time it’s going to be different without doing anything to change your patterns. When you don’t learn from the past you end up recreating it.

Think of relationships like steps in a game of life. Learning and growing from what didn’t work elevates you to the next level. Taking time to reflect on what could’ve been different, or what your ex taught you about yourself, gives you tools and new strategies to avoid recreating the same situation again and again. When you take time to reflect and have some solo time in between partnerships, each relationship becomes an opportunity to move forward in the game of life.

What To Do Instead:

Set aside time to be on your own after a relationship ends for a postmortem. Evaluate what you could’ve done differently. Feel all your feelings and grieve the loss. When you’re ready to move on, look for The Golden Nugget of Learning™ so you can mine the relationship and step into gratitude.

4. You Become a Chamelion

If you’ve been partnered through your formative 20’s and 30’s your sense of self is likely tied to being part of a couple. If your habit is to merge with your significant other, you’ll change your beliefs and behavior in order to please them, leaving you vulnerable to a co-dependent or otherwise toxic relationship.

This lack of self-awareness makes it nearly impossible to create a relationship rooted in authenticity because you haven’t developed your own identity. You’re more than just someone’s partner and if you don’t figure out who you are on your own, eventually you’ll become dissatisfied.

What To Do Instead:

Spending significant time as a single person is an opportunity to explore and discover about yourself. Examine your desires, values, and goals so you can build a life that feels complete on its own. A healthy partnership is when two whole and complete people come together to create a relationship. Then when you’re ready to date again you’ll be much more prepared to choose someone who’s a match to your dreams and goals, and to build a life together, growing in the same direction.

5. Avoiding The Pain Of Loneliness

Being alone doesn’t have to mean being lonely, but if you’ve never built a relationship with yourself, solitude can feel unbearable. Serial monogamy gives you just enough connection to avoid confronting the emptiness that you feel inside. It keeps you emotionally busy enough to never have to face what it feels like to be alone with yourself.

Even worse, if you don’t like yourself or the company of your thoughts, you’re partnering up to avoid addressing your relationship with yourself. Serial monogamy puts your level of self-esteem in someone else’s hands. If you’re relying on a partner to make you feel good about yourself, you’re setting yourself up for an unhealthy relationship dynamic.

Avoiding solitude means avoiding growth. If you can’t sit with your own feelings, meet your own needs, or enjoy your own company, you’ll always be at risk of attaching to someone who’s a distraction or worse, will drag you into a toxic dynamic that leaves you even more disconnected from yourself.

What To Do Instead:

Spend time alone and get to know yourself. Observe your inner dialogue and become aware of what you’re saying to yourself about yourself. Practice speaking to yourself like someone you love, instead of someone in need of constant correction or criticism. Take yourself out on a date and discover what brings you joy. When you master being alone, you’re not looking for someone to complete you or fill a void inside.

6. Bypassing The Vulnerability Of Dating

Dating may not easy because it requires risk and navigating the unknown. Serial monogamy robs you of mastering the discomfort of dating. On the search for an ideal life partner comfort is overrated.

Skipping or rushing through the dating process means you’ll never cultivate discernment. Without taking time to see if the other person can meet your needs, or if the two of you can find your way through a conflict, you’re attached before you know who they are, and whether they’re a good match long term.

What To Do Instead:

Use dating as an opportunity to discover about yourself. Become curious about your feelings during each date, as well as how you feel when you part from that person. Don’t rush into exclusivity and physical intimacy. Create a dating rotation so you can discover if you’re presenting yourself differently with each person, or if you’re showing up authentically. Dating in this manner allows you to choose someone who’s a good match for the long term.

7. You End Up Vulnerable To Toxic Relationships

Rushing to partner may cause you to go exclusive with a relative stranger. With no time to discover red flags you may find yourself in a bad situation. Convincing yourself that something is better than nothing is the recipe for a toxic or abusive relationship.

If you find you’re constantly compromising, managing your partner’s moods, and putting up with bad behavior you’re in an unhealthy situation. Rushing into a committed relationship quickly leaves you open to feeling more alone than you ever felt by yourself.

What To Do Instead:

Speak up if you feel uncomfortable and set boundaries so you no longer rush in too quickly. Don’t put too much weight on getting along and discover if you’re able to move through disagreements and conflict together.

Cultivate emotional self-sufficiency so you can build a life that’s rich, joyful, and fulfilling on your own. When you’re emotionally healthy and feel whole as a single person, you won’t be attracted to toxic situations or partners.

Break The Habit Of Serial Monogamy

Partnering with someone for a lifetime doesn’t begin by looking to ease the fear of being alone. A beloved partnership starts by finding someone capable of meeting your needs and who shares your values and your goals. Chemistry is only one ingredient for long-lasting love. Ultimately, your head and your heart must be in harmony to create an ideal match for the long term.

Breaking the cycle of serial monogamy will require you to choose growth over comfort. Sharing your life with the love of your life means you may not know you’ve found your “One” right at the start.

If you’re ready to end the cycle of serial monogamy and share your life with the love of your life, order our book: Getting It Right This Time: Break Free from Your Hidden Blocks to Lasting Love available everywhere books and audiobooks are sold. Select your favorite retailer by clicking here: Order today.

Long-lasting love isn’t found in your comfort zone—it’s only possible when you fall in love with yourself first.

Fear of rejection may not only be stopping you from searching for love, it’s probably interfering with your relationship strategies too. Fear of rejection can cause you to sabotage any chance you may have to find a life partner. Even worse, you may end up settling into a toxic relationship instead of a healthy one.

You can tame the beast of fear of rejection by turning your worries into strengths and change your fate in love and in life. It may feel like climbing Mt. Everest, but transforming your fears into confidence and resilience isn’t as challenging as you might imagine.

Because your fears and insecurities get in the way of your ability to create an emotional connection, once you have the tools to express yourself authentically you can master your emotional life, cultivate discernment through the dating process, and select an ideal life partner for love to last a lifetime.

It’s normal to feel butterflies when going on a first date, but when your anxiety escalates into paralyzing fear it’s time to address the underlying issue.

Fear Of Rejection Creates A Freeze Response

The most common tactic used when you suffer from the fear of rejection is to talk yourself out of taking any action at all. The fear becomes paralyzing as you imagine the object of your affection turning you down. The mental movie playing over and over in your mind keeps you frozen and unable to act.

The anticipation of the rejection amplifies your fear turning the simple act of talking to a potential date into a life-or-death scenario. You’re putting your lovability into the hands of a stranger, giving them the power to deem you worthy of love. This is never a good strategy for long-lasting love.

Fear Of Rejection Has You Twisting Into A Pretzel

Not everyone freezes when they fear being rejected. Some people turn into chameleons and find themselves twisting into a pretzel trying win over their latest crush. They’re too busy trying to earn love and approval to bother with evaluating if that person is an ideal match for them.

Oftentimes twisting into a pretzel can evolve into a strategy of going along to get along. If this is you, then you’ll have a hard time setting and keeping boundaries. Your fear of rejection causes you to agree with just about anything. Afraid that if you exercise your veto power, you’ll be rejected.

The fear of rejection can also stop you from moving on from a bad relationship. Afraid that if you leave the one person who wants to spend time with you—you’ll be left alone. Or you could settle for crumbs by agreeing to a friends-with-benefits situation when you really want more.

Fear Of Rejection Causes You To Be Overly Critical

If you’re hard on yourself, you’ll also be hard on any partner or prospect. Judgement is the biggest block to love. Let’s face it, if your standards are restrictive to the point that no one measures up to your impossible expectations, you’ll never have to risk your heart.

You can’t be rejected if you’re the one doling out rejection. Continuously finding flaws in everyone you meet might prevent you from feeling bad about yourself, but it won’t bring you the love you crave. Convincing yourself that all the issues that are keeping you single lie with the people you encounter keeps you safe. Sadly, you’re unwilling to admit that deep down you feel unworthy.

Regardless of how the fear of rejection manifests through your behavior, it is possible to overcome it. Exploring the reasons behind your fear of rejection is the next step in your journey to self-acceptance.

Root Causes For Fear Of Rejection

Unconsciously your fear of rejection is tasked with keeping you safe, but with most dating interactions you’re not in any physical danger. The danger you feel is a paper tiger. It may seem scary and threatening, but you won’t suffer any physical harm if your date isn’t interested in you.

Your biggest challenge is an emotional one, and it’s rooted in a subconscious belief about yourself. Maybe you believe you’re not worthy of love or that you’re not good enough (smart enough, attractive enough, or funny enough).

You’re afraid your potential date will notice all your flaws and weaknesses and reject you outright, proving that these limiting beliefs are valid. Anticipating the dismissal, you’ll feel even worse.

Placing too much importance on the outcome of the interaction—as if this person’s approval will finally bestow worthiness upon you. The fear is more about the meaning you’ve assigned to the interaction than on the actual act of asking for a date.

A broken heart can also cause anxiety about rejection, making it difficult to open your heart to someone new. The pain can trigger a fear of being hurt again, making the prospect of being vulnerable overwhelming. You start to second guess your worth and desirability, reliving the hurtful words your ex shared during the breakup.

The scars left by a broken heart can harden, making it challenging to show up authentically, keeping your potential date at arm’s length. The pain of heartbreak keeps you safe, but it also blocks you from finding lasting love with someone new.

How To Overcome Fear Of Rejection?

1. Master Your Inner Dialogue

It’s your inner dialog that’s triggering your fear, so recognizing your negative thoughts and changing them to positive ones builds confidence. The voice that says you’re unworthy, that no one likes you, or that you’re not attractive enough is the source of your anxiety. Removing it altogether so that you speak to yourself like someone you love is the cure.

Start by identifying a specific thought that triggers fear of rejection and turn it into an empowering affirmation. Change “I don’t deserve to be loved,” to “I am worthy of receiving the love I want.” Affirmations aren’t magical incantations that will make someone like you, however, they do help you feel more comfortable with yourself and more confident.

2. Don’t Get Caught Up In Comparisons

You’ll feel worse about yourself when you compare your circumstances to someone who has what you want. Comparison can reinforce your limiting beliefs and destroy your self-esteem.

Instead of constantly noticing how your life doesn’t match up to someone’s ideal portrayal on social media, put blinders on like a horse pulling a carriage. Your only measurement should be whether you are doing better today than you were yesterday. Like when running a marathon, focus on your progress regardless of how someone else’s life appears on the surface.

3. Practice Non-Attachment

Becoming attached too quickly to a specific person increases the fear of rejection. Rushing in and risking your heart too soon decreases your chance of finding long-lasting love. It may seem counter-intuitive, slowing down the dating process speeds up finding the right person for you.

Not being attached to an outcome allows you to be present in the moment. Getting to know someone takes time, and when you imagine a future with someone, your mind has time traveled. You’re no longer collecting data about whether they are a good match for you or not.

Instead of being attached to a specific person, decide that you’ll find an ideal match for the long term.

4. Learn To Speak Your Truth

Going along to get along or twisting into a pretzel to get someone to like you is inauthentic. You’re hiding your true feelings and desires because you’re afraid that you won’t be liked. The best antidote is to practice speaking your truth.

Start by identifying how you actually feel and speaking it out loud to yourself. This acknowledgment of your feelings will begin to validate them. The more confident you are at identifying your feelings, the more you can stretch toward sharing them with others. Your feelings are valid whether someone acknowledges them or agrees with them, and the more you speak your truth the more confident you’ll feel.

5. Step Toward Your Fears, Not Shy Away

Your emotional fears are paper tigers; they won’t actually kill you. Instead of avoiding your emotional fears and therefore protecting yourself from rejection, step into these fearful situations. You may not get what you want, but you’ll begin to learn that rejection isn’t the worst thing that could happen.

You survived the situation; the only bruise you have is on your ego. By stepping toward your emotional fears, you grow stronger and more confident because you realize that what you imagined happening was far worse than what actually happened. Step toward your fears and your confidence will grow.

6. Try Something New With Regularity

Learning new things puts you in the mindset of a beginner. Stepping outside of your comfort zone allows you to grow. You’ll move through a learning curve which builds compassion for self. Plus, you may find that you have new hobbies which are a great way to meet new people.

Talk to strangers and make new friends, go to a social event where you don’t know anyone, give a compliment to that cute person in line at the market. Your fear of rejection will subside when you regularly talk to people you don’t know.

7. Get Clear On What You Want (Not Who)

When you’re too focused on the object of your affection, you give them the power to approve of you or to reject you. Love doesn’t come from a person; it comes from inside of you.

Instead become crystal-clear on the type of relationship you desire and then date to find someone who is in alignment with your vision. When you know what you want (not who), then each rejection becomes a step closer to finding your ideal person.

8. Build A Resilient Heart

Resilience is built by realizing that you can grow from your failures instead of succumbing to them. Asking yourself, “How can I grow or improve so my next relationship is more fulfilling and long-lasting?

When you were a baby, you didn’t just start walking one day. You fell down quite a few times before you figured it out. You didn’t imagine that your failure to walk the first time you tried as a sign that you should never walk. The same is true of rejection.

By accepting disappointment as part of your journey, your heart becomes more resilient. Not everything will go your way in life. You may never become immune to rejection, but you won’t let it stop you in your tracks. You’ll pick yourself up and try again with someone else.

Fear of rejection doesn’t have to be a paralyzing force in your search for lasting love. You have the ability to face your fears, learn from your mistakes, and build resilience on your journey.

If fear of rejection is blocking you from the love you desire and you’re ready to embrace your confidence, join us for a complimentary Breakthrough Call. Isn’t it time for you to overcome your fears so you can have the relationship you desire and deserve?

The desire to emotionally merge with a partner is often romanticized in films, song lyrics, and poems. The misnomer that a partner completes you adds to the difficulty of individuating and setting healthy relationship boundaries. Ultimately, two people in love do not become one; they are two individuals coming together to share their lives.

Establishing and enforcing healthy relationship boundaries is critical for respectful love. Your ability or inability to set and maintain healthy boundaries profoundly affects your self-confidence and self-worth in relationship.

Relationship boundaries also help you set guidelines for acceptable behavior. When you have healthy boundaries in place, you can get your needs met without going into sacrifice.

By clearly defining what is and isn’t acceptable, boundaries help build trust and respect, ensuring that both partners feel seen and heard. This atmosphere of trust gives both of you the space to grow together rather than apart.

Without boundaries in a relationship, you can slip into a codependent dynamic. This means one partner sacrifices their needs in order to please their partner.

Healthy relationship boundaries ensure that neither party goes into sacrifice and creates healthy interdependence. Allowing both partners to thrive individually, as well as a couple.

9 Relationship Boundaries You Need To Master Before Your Next Relationship

1. The Boundary Of Respectful Love

There’s an old saying that familiarity breeds contempt. In an intimate relationship that can lead to harmful behaviors that wear away at the foundation of your connection. Love doesn’t mean that you can do or say anything to your partner. Relationship boundaries create respectful behavior and allow love to thrive.

Respectful love has boundaries built into it that leave space for your individuality and create an atmosphere of mutual respect. Boundaries help ensure that both partners are treated with kindness and consideration, preventing hurtful behaviors that come from taking each other for granted. Without relationship boundaries, familiarity can indeed breed contempt, leading to a breakdown in communication and respect.

When you have boundaries in a relationship you create an environment where love can flourish. Ultimately, boundaries create the structure to navigate your differences and find common ground.

2. Physical Relationship Boundaries

Love doesn’t give someone the right to your body, your personal space, or your time. Physical boundaries help keep you comfortable and safe and ensure your individuality within a relationship.

Physical boundaries create a respectful environment where both of you understand and honor the space you’re sharing. This creates individual autonomy, allowing you to decide what you wish to do with your own body, and your own resources.

In a long-term relationship, when you share the same space it’s important to have agreements about time together and time apart. It’s important to have your private space and your private thoughts.

You should be able to talk about anything but not have to talk about everything. Communicating about your physical and personal needs lays the groundwork for harmony in your home. Relationship boundaries cultivate a strong sense of trust and a feeling of safety.

3. Boundaries For Taking Responsibility

Have you ever taken responsibility for your partner’s mood or behavior? Or blame others when things don’t go your way? Get defensive when given feedback?

When you either take too much responsibility for others’ behavior or don’t take responsibility for your own, you have an issue keeping healthy relationship boundaries.

The responsibility equation provides a framework for knowing what is your responsibility, and what is not.

The Responsibility Equation: When someone has a problem with you, it’s their problem. When you have a problem with someone, it’s your problem.

To have healthy relationship boundaries, you must be aware of your triggers and wounds as well as your strategies for giving and receiving love. It isn’t your partner’s responsibility to avoiding triggering you. You’re responsible for your emotional life, reactions, as well as the actions you take when upset.

Your partner’s feelings and their behaviors aren’t your responsibility. They don’t belong to you. This doesn’t mean that you’re without compassion or empathy, rather it means you won’t take responsibility for their actions and emotions. It’s not your job to fix them.

When you live by the responsibility equation, you’ll always have healthy relationship boundaries, and you’ll avoid going into sacrifice.

4. Learn To Use Conflict To Create Deeper Connection

Instead of viewing conflict as a red flag, expect that you and your partner will sometimes have miscommunication, misunderstandings, and even argue sometimes. Sharing your life with another person is messy.

Avoiding conflict to keep the peace doesn’t create harmony in your home. Instead, it creates a cold war between you and leaves hidden landmines in your relationship which can explode at any time.

One sure way to grow apart is to avoid conflict, which can also build up resentment in you or your partner. Eventually, you won’t be able to hold it in and you’ll explode like a volcano. Holding your feelings in will eventually make it harder to have difficult conversations.

Learn to lean into your differences, speak your truth, and make your relationship a safe place to express emotions even when there’s a conflict. Disputes are a natural occurrence between two people who have different experiences and strategies for dealing with stress.

Embracing conflict as an opportunity, you can create a safe space to work through your differences and create a lasting connection.

5. Practice Non-Violent Communication

An important tool for working through your differences is to focus on “I” language instead of “You” language. When emotions are heated it’s easy to speak about all the things your partner is doing that are upsetting to you. “You did this, or you didn’t say that,” can feel like an attack.

Instead, focus your communication on your own emotional experience by saying, “I don’t feel heard.” Or, “I’m feeling sad right now.”

Non-violent communication fosters empathy and understanding instead of placing blame. It encourages you to express your own feelings and needs without judgment and allows you to listen to your partner’s feelings and needs with compassion.

The goal is to create a space where both of you feel heard and respected, which leads to a stronger connection between you and makes your relationship a space of respect and connection to promote healing.

Non-violent communication allows you to have respectful relationship boundaries even through misunderstandings and conflict.

6. Master The Walters’ Communication Template: The SHYFT

The most effective way to communicate your differences or to make requests in your relationship is to use the Speak How You Feel Template (SHYFT). The SHYFT gives you a framework for having uncomfortable conversations and leverages the opportunity to repair and reconnect.

There are three steps to the SHYFT:

• Identify and speak your emotions: “I feel ____________.”
• Put them into context: “When _____[context]_______.” (Avoid saying “You.”)
• Make a direct request or offer a joint solution: “Would you please ____________.” Or “Can we please ____________.”

This communication template allows you to express your feelings without blaming your partner and to make a request for a change if necessary. By putting your feelings into context you’re helping your partner see your point of view.

This same template can be used to make a request for something you would like your partner to do.
Example:

“I feel cherished when the person I’m dating opens the car door for me. Would you make an effort to open my car door when we go out?”

The SHYFT is the most effective tool for creating healthy relationship boundaries because it incorporates “I” language. It gives you the words to take responsibility for your feelings, and it gives you an opportunity to make a request.

There is no magical communication template to make someone behave the way you want them to. Utilizing the SHYFT allows you to evaluate the other person’s capacity and desire to meet your needs.

7. Earning The Benefit Of The Doubt

When you give a stranger the benefit of the doubt you open yourself up to being taken advantage of. Most people Date Backward: They give the benefit of the doubt to someone they barely know because it’s new and exciting. Sadly, after someone has earned the benefit of the doubt they tend to not get it from their long-standing partner.

Beware of instant intimacy! What you think is a deep connection with someone you just met could actually mean they resemble a familiar energy or experience. The brain science of attraction proves that you are attracted to the familiar.

If you haven’t had the happy, healthy relationship you’ve always dreamed of yet, it’s essential to embrace Slow Love so you can break your negative patterns in relationship. Having healthy boundaries in relationship is also imperative.

Don’t give someone you just started dating the benefit of the doubt until they’ve earned it. Once they’ve proven they’re in it to win it with you, and they’ve earned your trust, give them the benefit of the doubt.

8. Setting Healthy Relationship Boundaries

When you struggle with relationship boundaries, you can seesaw between having no boundaries and setting hard boundaries, like the Great Wall of China. Boundaries give you guidelines for respectful behavior, but they aren’t the solution to your habit of over-giving or going into sacrifice.

If you have a strategy of giving to get in your relationships, you’ll eventually feel angry and resentful when your partner doesn’t reciprocate your behavior. You don’t have to earn love or become a martyr. Healthy boundaries are flexible and allow space for the gray areas of life.

Your partner isn’t responsible for your strategy sacrificing your needs, you are. And you’re also responsible for ensuring your needs get met. Healthy relationship boundaries make sure both of you get what you need.

9. Co-dependence vs. Interdependence

There’s been so much emphasis on avoiding co-dependence in intimate relationships that many people have overcorrected and have created hard boundaries which cause you to feel lonely and alone. Humans are social creatures and need emotional connection.

A healthy relationship is an interdependent relationship, not one that emphasizes independence. Supporting each other emotionally fosters trust, love, and happiness. It’s vital to thriving in your life.

When you take your time getting to know someone, speak your feelings authentically, take responsibility for your needs getting met, and develop healthy relationship boundaries, you’re laying the groundwork for your relationship to thrive. Your self-confidence, self-esteem, happiness, and joy all depend on it.

If you’re struggling with relationship boundaries or need to develop more skills for lasting love, purchase our debut book: GETTING IT RIGHT THIS TIME: Break Free from Your Hidden Blocks to Lasting Love from Penguin Random House. This step-by-step guide will take you on a journey to identify your blocks to love, transform them to develop confidence, and manifest the long-lasting love relationship you desire and deserve.