One of our qualifications for becoming Soulmate Coaches is that between the two of us, we\u2019ve made almost every mistake you can make in relationship. So between us, we\u2019ve experienced a lot of heartbreak and heartache.<\/p>\n
To urge you forward on the path of healing and moving on toward your beloved here are:<\/p>\n Unless you share children, property, or a business, disengage from all contact. Unfriend, unfollow, and yes, even block across all your social media accounts. It doesn\u2019t have to be this way forever, it\u2019s temporary so you can heal.<\/p>\n Having contact with your ex while your heart is still raw from the breakup will keep the wound open and slow down the healing process.<\/p>\n If he suggests that he wants to stay \u201cfriends\u201d set a clear boundary that you don\u2019t want him to contact you. You will contact him in the future when you have healed your heart and can spend time with him without the pain of wanting more.<\/p>\n There is a huge difference that people miss between being friends and being friendly. The offer of being friends is generally a way to\u00a0ease the guilt of the person who initiated the breakup.<\/a>\u00a0There doesn\u2019t have to be animosity for you to ask your ex to not contact you. It\u2019s simply a way to get some distance so you can heal your broken heart.<\/p>\n A friend is someone you call to share joy or sorrow, a person you hang out or attend events with, or have over for dinner. If you\u2019re not going to do these things with this ex once you are with your beloved then there is no friendship there. You can be friendly with your ex; meaning if you were to bump into him in the future you\u2019d stick around to for a quick chat.<\/p>\n Rushing into a friendship with your ex right after breaking up leaves you vulnerable to prolonging the pain of the heartbreak. You can\u2019t heal a broken heart this way. Do yourself a favor and nip it in the bud. No contact and time are your two best friends when healing a broken heart.<\/p>\n One of the biggest mistakes you can make that will keep you stuck in the heartache of lost love is believing that this person was your one true soulmate and you\u2019ll never find another like him.<\/p>\n In order to heal a broken heart, you have to remember that\u00a0he is not a unicorn.<\/a>\u00a0He is not some rare, unique individual. You can (and will) meet plenty of other men worthy of your love. You may even meet someone that you love more than you could have ever imagined loving your ex.<\/p>\n You can\u2019t heal a broken heart when you are stuck believing that you screwed up your only chance at love. Love is infinite and has infinite expressions. You may have lost a relationship but you can never lose love.<\/p>\n The love you are seeking is inside of you. It is this love that you share with another. You don\u2019t get love from someone so you can never lose love from someone.<\/p>\n You create meanings from events \u2013 and whether those meanings are true or not, they end up defining you over time because you collect and bundle these meanings together in your subconscious mind which then looks for corroborating evidence to the case in point.<\/p>\n This is a fancy way of saying that what you believe is true about you, or what is possible for you when it comes to love or anything else is based on your past experiences, however, you can break free of those meanings and change them to be more useful to you to create what you desire.<\/p>\n Approach your breakup knowing deep down that even though this relationship didn\u2019t last, you are not broken, you did not screw it up, and you can meet\u00a0someone even better suited for you<\/a>\u00a0than your ex.<\/p>\n Conversing with your inner critic or worse yet, allowing your inner critical voice to run rampant while you\u2019re attempting to heal a broken heart is counterproductive. It doesn\u2019t matter what you did or said. If he had been the right person for you, the two of you would find your way through the conflict to form a deeper connection.<\/p>\n Now is the time to open up to\u00a0love yourself no matter what!<\/a><\/p>\n You may have not been perfect \u2013 it\u2019s okay.<\/p>\n You may have said or done things that you wish you hadn\u2019t \u2013 forgive yourself.<\/p>\n You may have good days and bad days \u2013 allow your feelings to exist and flow through you.<\/p>\n Take extra special care of yourself like you are the most precious thing on this earth. In truth \u2013 you are!<\/p>\n Allow yourself to sleep in. Maybe splurge on something you\u2019ve been wanting to buy for yourself. Go for walks. Spend time in nature.<\/p>\n There is no time limit on grief. So you may find that healing your heart takes longer than you thought, and that\u2019s okay. You\u2019re not on some made-up timetable your brain would like you to be.<\/p>\n The one thing you can count on is that your feelings will shift and change. They always do. When you feel good and you\u2019re in joy or bliss you are never so delusional to think you\u2019ll feel great forever. Unfortunately, when you feel hurt, sad, or in despair your ego-mind will lie to you and tell you that you won\u2019t ever feel differently. We promise you that you will \u2013 your heart will heal and you will feel better and you\u2019ll even love again.<\/p>\n To heal a broken heart come into alignment with this truth. You are love. Love cannot be taken from you because it is you. When your heart breaks it breaks open to hold more love.<\/p>\n The experience you\u2019ve been through has a silver lining<\/a>\u00a0\u2013 a blessing. The best answer we know of to the question, \u201cWhy do bad things happen to good people?\u201d is this:<\/p>\n To make them better.<\/p>\n You will in some way become better for whatever it is you\u2019re going through.<\/p>\n Maybe you will discover how strong you are.<\/p>\n Maybe you will get crystal clear on the kind of relationship you want.<\/p>\n Maybe you discover your purpose in life.<\/p>\n Maybe you end up being helpful to others.<\/p>\n Maybe you learn to love yourself more.<\/p>\n You can heal a broken heart by being grateful for the experience you\u2019ve had. That person came into your life for a reason and when you discover the reason you will become a better person for it.<\/p>\n Think of life like a game \u2013 you can move giant steps toward your beloved when you discover\u00a0The Golden Nugget Of Learning.<\/a>\u00a0Why were you in relationship with that specific person? It had to be that exact human being for you to gain what you needed to move forward on your path toward your beloved.<\/p>\n Healing your heart means you can have gratitude for even the worst of experiences. Orna has gratitude for having survived domestic violence with a boyfriend who tried to kill her. Matthew went on a journey of self-acceptance after a tumultuous relationship with a woman he had been constantly trying to please.<\/p>\n Once you\u2019ve discovered The Golden Nugget Of Learning the pain of the breakup will no longer have power over you because you\u2019ll be on the other side and changed for the better.<\/p>\n Endings are hard because we start a relationship with a lot of hope. So hope is the first thing that comes into a relationship, and it is the last thing to leave. When you kill the hope you can move on and release the other person for the highest good for all.<\/p>\n It may sound cruel for us to ask this of you, and we want you to know that killing the hope is the fastest path to heal a broken heart.<\/p>\n Give up on what you had hoped would be. Really let the dreams and plans you had with your ex die on the vine because this will create the space for something new,\u00a0something better, to come into that space.<\/p>\n Death is a symbol of change and new beginnings. You can treat the end of a relationship like a death and mourn it. It\u2019s good to put that kind of finality on it. Schedule time in your calendar to feel your grief and set a timer when you do.<\/p>\n You\u2019ll be amazed at how quickly you start to feel better when you stop resisting your negative emotions. These feelings can only hurt you when you resist them, allowing them to get stuck in your body and create disease.<\/p>\n You are a human being \u2013 not a human doing. Leave open space in your calendar to just be with your emotional life. Invite a good friend over to just be with you. Cry, scream, punch a pillow, whatever you need to do to allow the emotions to flow through your physical body. Then kill the hope of that relationship ever returning. When you do you will finally be free to love again.<\/p>\n5 Steps You Need To Take Now To Heal A Broken Heart<\/h3>\n
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Cut Off All Contact<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
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Remember That He Is Not A Unicorn<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
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Be Kind, Compassionate, And Loving With Yourself<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
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When Your Heart Breaks It Breaks Open To Hold More Love<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
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Kill The Hope<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n